Of arguments, movie, and a letter.

Chris and I had a not-so-pleasant conversation while chatting last night. Like with all our other arguments, it started with an extremely petty thing, blown out of proportion. You see, it's the time of the month where I let my bitchier side take-over, and I become the most deviant person imaginable. Too bad, he was at the unfortunate end of my childish, bitchy wrath..

We both knew from Day 1 that our personalities are the extreme opposite of each other, and yet we decided to defy the odds and stick to each other like a pair of star-crossed lovers. Well, I'm a non-conformist by nature. I feel diffiuclt to conform to a certain ideology, especially if I think there's something wrong with it, or if it's against my moral beliefs. But for the sake of making this interracial and sometimes-long-distance relationship work, I force myself to adjust and conform to all those rules he annoyingly mapped out for me. I do appreciate the things that he does cause I know it's all for the better. But sometimes his concern becomes way too much, and I would really like it if he'll give me some space to think on my own, and space to make mistakes and learn from them. I hate being told what to do, and what I cannot do.. and Chris has been doing this a lot lately. Last night, in the middle of his usual speech, I snapped. If my cheeks had been any hotter, I swear it would've burst into flames... and that's how upset I was at that time. I know I may have overreacted, and again I'm blaming the ever-so-convenient PMS for all the unnecessary rage. I just wanted to show him how sick I was from constantly hearing his piece, and all those rules and schedules I have to, but almost never follow. I cannot put it into words exactly, but if you happen to see the movie "One More Chance", you'll understand me more. Chris is somewhat similar to John Lloyd there (though not to that extent of being "pakialamero"), but in any case it's annoying, and I'm bound to snap like Bea one day..

Since my PMS is still in full throttle, I choose to continue acting like this bratty drama-queen and refuse his calls, even after he apologized thru mail right after the argument.. I'm pasting a copy of his mail (he's sooo gonna kill me if he knew I posted it here.. ^^) which is really simple but also incredibly sweet. The context may sound weird to some people, but he's Korean, and it's very much evident in his writing..

***

today, we didn't have nice conversation and i'm sorry for my mistake. but let you know I miss you a lot.

your Oppa.